The downside of empathy

In my world, we are all about the empathy. To the point of ridiculousness sometimes. And I'm good at it. I can totally "get" the most bullshit stuff or tortorous stuff. I can empathize with people who did/have done/are doing horrendous things and simultaneously feel for the victims. I consider it a strength that I'm able to maintain my belief that people, in general, are not malicious. Selfish yes. Assholes, yes. Narcissistic and short sided for sure. But I don't honestly believe people set out to be shitty human beings.

So all of this makes me a strange conversationalist but I'm also able to be painfully diplomatic, rational,and to find a way to interact authentically with most people. On the other hand, there are times where all I want is to be narrow-focused and not care about someone else's experience. I just want to be angry and righteous and unreasonable. And it's making me fucking pissed that I can't live in that place. Which means I'm wandering around with unfocused irritation. Blech.