Me: Hey! We don't scream inside
A: Do we scream outside?
Me: Yes Baby. We can scream outside but not inside. Please don't scream inside.
A: Why not?
It should be mentioned that this conversation is happening in a public bathroom stall.
Me: Because when you scream inside, it hurts my ears. Now pull up your pants.
A: (without pause) But what if I was alone? Would it hurt your ears?
Me: No, I guess it wouldn't hurt my ears if you were alone. Pants.
A: Then I'd like to be alone please.
Apparently I've become her straight man?