Monday, November 14, 2011

Angsty Susie Sunshine

I really, really wanted that list to come out today. And it didn't. And at work that was combined with a whole lot of other fuckery that included a group of inmates bitching and whining that I was making them participate in the therapy group instead of "just letting us watch the fucking movie." Awesome.

I threw in the towel about an hour early, came home and spent that hour productively perusing Pinterest, and picked up the babies. I love how quickly they can turn a shitty day around (venting to the very awesome director and associate director didn't hurt either.) But oh boy, I am so very grateful for my family right now. I realized, driving home, that I am really, really stressed out. It only hits though when I'm away from home. Because at home there are two little munchkins randomly stripping off their clothes to do the nakey-dance. Two little rugrats climbing over me, begging for just one more story. An amazing man who congratulates me when I FINALLY make it all the way through a Harry Potter movie.

I need that list to come out soon. I'm tired of not knowing, not knowing where we'll be, what we'll be doing, if I'll have a job. Not knowing whether to buy a nightstand because "we'll probably just have to move it anyway." Not knowing if I should sign Eli up for karate because "who knows where we'll be in three months." Tired of just not knowing.

3 comments:

imaya said...

I love this post. So true about family. SO SO true about having kids. I HATE the not knowing. I hate the not having control in the not knowing. I can't tell you how much I just want to know where we will be moving next summer. I can't tell you how much I just want Joe to get his damn grad apps in so we can find out. Not knowing when your income and livelihood is so closely attached must be even harder. I say sign him up for karate. If you move in three months at least when you sign him up again he will have a bit of the edge by not being a total novice.

gen said...

Today was fraught with fuckery to, a whole day of it. You're note alone and your new photo looks awesome BTW.

gen said...

wow, could I have had more typos in one comment? Sorry - it's the fuckery's fault!