Wednesday, April 13, 2011

It's amazing I have any ego at all

Dude. I got back into running (the C2K program. LOVE IT!) and again started gaining weight. WTF? I took a few days off and lost three pounds. C and I were talking about it, and it may be that I eat better without the "but I'm running today" justification, but still. Erg. One of the things I love about kids and inmates is that they rarely have a working censor. They say whatever pops into their head and it's usually said without mean intentions. But still. Two women have asked me, on separate occasions, if I'm pregnant this week. Really?! I'll admit I don't have washboard abs, but I don't think I'm that lumpy. I mean, maybe I should carry a picture of me pregnant for comparison. Like "Please? You think this looks pregnant? Check this shit out!" I've never had great skin, and I have lamented for awhile that I should not have to endure both pimples and wrinkles. But alas. And lately it hasn't been great (I'm sure it has nothing to do with collapsing in bed in full make-up. Or the new coffee habit. Though now I'm thinking "weight gain, belly bloat, and pimples. Hmmm." Moving on.) And Syd loves the spots. She forces my face in different directions so that she can touch each one like some dermatalogical anthropologist. Every time she sees me. Thanks Baby. So sweet. Oh a new one! Yay! Geez. So summary. Fat. Lazy. Pimply. It's like being a teenager without the angst and less flannel. Though I'm slightly more mature, usually, these days. And I was pulling myself through pretty well. But now I've also lost my voice. Fat, lazy, pimply, with a Peter Brady voice and I'm officially pushing the limits of healthy self-esteem.

3 comments:

Remenak Family said...

Yeah, but your ego is still intact cause you know all those other great things about you. Like your sassy, confident attitude, your hair that I am envious of, your gorgeous huge eyes, oh and that Dr. that you can put in front of your name-just to name a few. Besides whose tummy ever really goes back to pre-baby stage in that first year or two post pregnancy (if ever)? And there is a reason why God blessed women with MAC, so pimples who cares.

abba said...

Precious daughter, I've started this comment several times - trying not to sound patronizing, scolding or corny - with no luck. A bikini body and flawless skin is nothing compared to happy kids and a happy home. That said, I highly recommend you wear Sketcher's Shape-ups and cut out french fries. Have you seen my baby belly? O.K., I tried, but can't resist . . . you are rocking awesome and shouldn't weigh yourself (mentally or physically) so often or so critically. Love you.

Laura said...

Ha ha, it's not just you that feels this way my friend. I definitely feel your pain myself! I also just finished reading my best friend's blog post about being 5 months post partum and no joke, here's just a snippet from her post:

"In addition to this wonderful blubber, I also am balding"

Ahh.... motherhood :)